Another Baby Question For You Moms- The Red Headed Hostess

BABY NOTICE

I have another baby question for all of you wonderful mothers…And first let me say that I really appreciate all of your previous advice! I have read every single comment, taken notes and have bought some of your suggestions.

So… here is my question for today:

Since this is my last week teaching seminary, I plan on diving into some good informative books and things to help me feel a little more prepared for this little girl.

What are some good books that you recommend?

You could also include websites, magazines, and dvds.

I am looking for how to care for a newborn type things as well as parenting books.

Many of you already recommended “The Happiest Baby on the Block“, and I have already bought that and LOVED it. Thank You!

Thank you for your suggestions!!!

Check out our website here!

77 comments

  1. I highly recommend the No-Cry books by Elizabeth Pantley! I just had baby #7 last week and we’re living at the NICU currently. Her sleep books are my favorite but I’ve read all of her books and enjoyed them. She gives you a whole lot of knowledge and tools to find solutions for your individual child and family.

  2. The Dunstan thing works – I found it so much easier when I recognized my baby saying “neh” in her cry!

    “The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night” by Elizabeth Pantley

    “Heading Home with Your Newborn: From Birth to Reality” by Laura A. Jana MD FAAP, Jennifer Shu MD FAAP – they’re pediatricians AND mothers so they know their stuff….and my husband learnt a lot from this one too.

  3. There is plenty of reading with good advice.

    And not to be contrary, but simply to offer my own $.02 – the one thing I would caution against is dulling your own mother’s intuition with too much “book learning”.

    I read a whole bunch of stuff in my early mom years, and chatted with my pediatrician, and learned that while there’s a ton of information – the best inspiration to follow was from my own mother heart.

    (I think you would love Elder Holland’s talk “Because She Is A Mother” if there’s any chance you haven’t read it already. 🙂

    I see lots of moms relying on “the book” but not all books agree, nor are they written with inspiration. Often book advice is impractical or worse, spiritually misguided. As a result, even the most “prepared” and well-read moms can find themselves conflicted, confused or overwhelmed in ways that their God-given mother’s instinct could have spared them.

    Trust yourself and even more in Heavenly Father and your gospel learning. You’ll be a great mom! Enjoy the “mom” reading – there is good info. out there – especially for an excited, nervous first time mom – but rely on heaven to sort what should be followed lock step and what’s merely interesting advice.

    Including this comment. 🙂

  4. I loved the Baby 411 book (you can get it on Amazon– there is an updated version every few years). I found it very informative for the basic infant care questions. Plus, it’s written in a format that was very easy to follow.

  5. I would have to agree with Meg. You can only get so much information from books. I would suggest listening to the spirit. This little girl is about as close to heaven as you can get.

    That being said, I really liked the book What to Expect when you’re Expecting. It really helped me in getting prepared for my kids coming.

    Parenting is a totally different experience. A wonderful one, but no two kids are alike. I know. I have 4 totally different personalities in my home. I wouldn’t change it for the world.
    Also finding a mother that you admire and getting some advice from her is great. I talk to my mom almost everyday asking for advice on boys and she only had girls. We laugh a lot!

  6. I, too, agree with Meg. Before my first was born and in his first few weeks I read e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g I could find on pregnancy, newborns, sleeping, eating, diapers, and all. I filled my mind with options, and then, one night as I was weeping about the guilt over doing it one way instead of another (this book says this way! But this one says if I do it that way, he will feel abandoned! This other book says he expects THIS!), my husband ordered me to stop reading. He packed up all the books and took them back to the library. “You are our son’s mother,” he said, “God sent him to YOU. Not to any of these people. You have the information, now choose what works for us. For him, and for you. If you’re not happy, he’s not going to be happy. I want you happy, not feeling guilty.”

    Read away. Check out a bunch from your library. Read whatever you want and all different philosophies – your child may not conform to this method or that method or any method! 🙂 And then, as you already know, trust in the Lord. Get on your knees a lot to pray for guidance (because he already knows this little person really well) and then just do what you feel is best.

    The books I like are from all different paths and I’ve used different ideas from each with each child. You can do this. Love your baby, trust yourself, and tell the guilt (because it will come) to take a hike.

  7. “For the Children’s Sake” by Susan Schaeffer Macaulay. It is a fabulous book on parenting that I wish I’d found before I started having kids. As it is, my oldest is almost 12, and I am so grateful I’m finally learning this.

    Another fantastic one is “Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline” by Becky Bailey. Even though the title makes it sound like a discipline book (which of course you won’t need for a while), it’s actually a book on beautiful, Christ-like, child-loving parenting. I highly recommend it.

  8. Meg is right on.
    The only thing I want to add is that the best way to take care of your baby is to take care of YOU! It is a difficult transition no matter how much you have longed to be a mother. You go from a great deal of interaction with others to being consumed by this new being. You go from uninterrupted sleep to years without sleep. I just know that the mistake I made was not making my well-being a priority. The diapers and feedings will come. The love will cover nearly any inadequacies you may feel you have. Just don’t forget YOU in the process & let the spirit guide and everything will be amazing!

  9. I agree with Meg about relying too much on books. I think a discipline book that we read early on misguided us when we started with our 8 kids. Thankfully we changed course along the way and tempered the advise. I believe I received the best advise from the scriptures, and the Spirit. After those, I found inspirational families that I sought to emulate. One book that I did find helpful was “Raising Up a Family to the Lord” by Gene Cook. He gives quotes from church leaders and uses scriptures often.

  10. I read all the books I could get my hands on when I started having my children ages 11, 9, 6, 3. I thought the more knowledge I had the easier it would be. I relate to a couple of the others who commented. It overwhelmed me, so much so, that I lost all confidence in my own intuition (really the Spirit!). The reason I read your blog is because I really feel the best parenting book is the Book of Mormon! I had never really studied the scriptures and your blogging has changed that. We had a problem with contention in our home between siblings. I always thought the problem was them and I needed a book to “fix” the problem. Since diving more fully into the scriptures I have seen change in our home. I’m not sure if I was the problem that needed to be fixed or if it’s the blessings from studying, but it WORKS! Have faith in yourself and the Spirit, you will be a wonderful mother because you are armed with an amazing knowledge of the gospel!

  11. I have started giving The Read Aloud Handbook by Jim Trelease to all new moms. It has become my new standard baby shower gift. Or Honey for a Child’s heart by Gladys Hunt. They are both great reads about the power of books in a child’s life and have done so much more for me than books about what babies do the first year although having one of those types of books is good to have around but most of that can be found online.

  12. I only read one book and that was ‘On becoming Babywise’ and it worked for all 3 of my kids and in 6 weeks I”m having another girl and will use the same method with her.
    I struggled with my first child because my ‘mothers intuition’ never kicked in and I started to get upset and a little downtrodden.
    Breastfeeding was hard for me as well. I was given this book and it helped me to have a ‘plan’ and it helped me feel like I could do this and not crumble under the responsibility.
    I consider myself a spiritual person. I study around an hour a day both bible, book of mormon as well as conference, months ensign and the new Prophet book we just got.
    I have a firm testimony and I considered that book a help to me.
    It’s not for everyone though and depends on your personality I guess.
    My mother in law and I had an argument over it because it went against how SHE raised her babies.
    People will always give you advise……………..always, it’s up to us as mothers to find what works for us and throw everything else aside and go with what we know will work for us as well as our kids and for each of us……..this is very different.
    Good luck.

  13. I agree with what many of the other mothers have said about intuition. Relying on your own inspiration is the most important thing. Don’t feel like you CAN’T read books, but understand that when you do, you don’t have to buy into everything they tell you.

    I found “What to Expect the First Year” very helpful with my first baby. It was a great resource for my constant questions. For example, my baby sneezed a lot, so I was paranoid that he was dying (or at least allergic to the cat or something), and I looked up sneezing and was very comforted by what I found. The book was great for medical and developmental questions.

    For help with parenting, I really like “Christ-Like Parenting” by Glenn Latham and “Positive Discipline” by Jane Nelson. Also, as another reader mentioned, “The Parenting Breakthrough” by Merliee Boyack is excellent. Also “5 Spiritual Solutions for Everyday Parenting Problems” by the Eyres.

    http://www.powerofmoms.com is another great, uplifting resource.

  14. I always recommend the books by Dr. William Sears. I read “The Baby Book” and have found that 10 years later I am still following a lot the advice from this book. he has several great books about Parenting, Breastfeeding etc. wonderful resources, in my opinion! of course, don’t be afraid to do what you feel works best for you!

  15. I also think that reading way too many books can overwhelm your sense of intuition as a mother, but reading some is definitely helpful.
    I loved a quote I read somewhere that went something like this: “Studying the scriptures will change behavior quicker then the study of behavior will change behavior”…or something along those lines.
    In my book reading, I always go back to that…there are some great books out there, but the ones I’ve really cherished were written by LDS authors, and specifically used scriptural references….check out the book, “What the scriptures teach about raising a child”, it’s by Micheal Wilcox.
    Good luck!

  16. I really liked “What to Expect the First Year” as my go-to book for baby questions. I never read a lot of newborn care books, just asked family, friends, etc. As my kids have gotten older, I’ve read more parenting/discipline books. I’ve found that I take a bit here and a bit there and mesh them together into my own style. Some that I’ve found very helpful have been “1-2-3 Magic” and the Love and Logic program. I’ve also found that “Raising Your Spirited Child” by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka has been helpful.

  17. So smart to read before the baby comes! I had assumed that I’d be able to figure everything out on my own and then ended up frantically searching through the library when my baby was 9 weeks old and was fussy all the time. Not fun… On the other hand I could read through things and know what would work with my baby and what wouldn’t.

    The book I found that I liked the most was The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems. She talks about getting the baby on a routine, feeding, sleeping, potty training, etc. I also liked Jo Frost’s Confident Baby Care. If you’re looking for more of a “caring for a newborn” book that might be a good one. I also thought that La Leche League’s The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding was a good book. If you’re planning to breastfeed I highly recommend reading books dedicated to that and buying one to reference throughout the first few weeks.

    Just try to space out reading different books otherwise you might call your friends completely panicked because you don’t know which way is up anymore.

  18. I liked many of the books already mentioned, but I also really liked The Baby Book by Dr. William Sears. (http://www.amazon.com/Baby-Book-Everything-Revised-Updated/dp/0316778001/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1326731894&sr=8-1) I have used this book for all 6 of my children.

    Another great one (for once baby is little older) is Parenting: A House United by Nicholeen Peck. (http://www.amazon.com/Parenting-House-United-Nicholeen-Peck/dp/B005FR61Y2/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1326731917&sr=1-1)

    And yes, it will seem like for the first little while, all you can do is to sit on the couch and nurse that sweet baby. That’s normal. 🙂 Don’t hesitate to check out a La Leche League group for breastfeeding support.

  19. I LOVE the book, “Raising Up a Family to the Lord,” by Gene R. Cook. If you only read one parenting book, this would be worth your while. It has influenced my parenting more than any other book, besides the scriptures. I just discovered that it is out of print (please bring it back, Deseret Book!) but you can find it used on Amazon. It is still available as an ebook, or in abridged version as a cd or mp3 audio talk from Deseret Book. I highly recommend it!!!

    (I recently wrote a post on parenting books at http://www.latter-dayhomeschooling.com/2012/01/parenting-books.html and there were some excellent recommendations in the comments too.)

    I heartily agree with the other comments regarding following the Spirit and taking care of yourself. Having a new baby brings a roller-coaster of emotions and hormones. There are incredible highs, but it can also be bumpy at times. Staying close to the Lord (and asking for help when you need it) will keep you sane and help you to cherish every moment with your sweet babe.

    I am SO excited for you to be a mother! You have such an excellent foundation and I’m sure the Lord has great things in store for you and your family!

  20. I agree with Meg and Jill. Heavenly Father has the “manual” for your baby. Every baby is different, what works for one doesn’t work for others. The scriptures are the most important. Listen to your heart and the Spirit, and you will be directed to the ‘right’ book if you are having an issue that you need help with, or even send you another mother who has ‘been there done that’. Then pick and choose what works for you, and throw the rest away, including the guilt. Give yourself permission to do what works for your family, even if it is different from the rest, or is not the ‘norm.’

    I like the Baby Book by Dr. Sears, but you MUST be willing to read that with a grain of salt. He promotes attachment parenting (which resonates with me up to a point – I totally agree with babywearing the first few months), and isn’t anti – cosleeping, which was a lifesaver for me with my 3rd, VERY needy baby. He WOULDN’T sleep alone. The only way that I got sleep was if he was in my bed. That went against everything I believed, but I was delirious after the first three days home from the hospital and only two hours of sleep. I was willing to try anything. However, I have read reviews of that book, and people hated it, saying that they tried cosleeping, and nobody slept, everyone was exhausted and cranky, and it almost killed their marriage. Even if you don’t buy into attachment parenting, it also addresses things like sneezing, and is a worthwhile reference. Check it out from the library
    to see if you like it before you buy it.

    And if you feel strongly about breastfeeding, The Breastfeeding Handbook by the la leche league. I’d check the library. It was helpful to read before my first was born. If it is important to you to breastfeed, find a local la leche league for support as well…..the first few days (sometimes weeks) can be rocky, but it eventually works itself out.

  21. The womanly guide to breastfeeding. Call your local la leche league and get a copy. Go, I’ll wait. 🙂 then, the baby book by Dr Sears, or any of the Sears books. Oh, your la leche league probably has a lending library full of wonderful books (Weber/davis group has a list on goodreads.com). Alfie kohn is good too.

  22. Hi Shannon!

    Raising babies is the easy part it’s when they turn 1 that is starts getting tricky and you have to desperately read the parenting books!

    My favorites are: Anything by Richard and Linda Eyre!! They are AMAZING and are truly sent from Heaven to help us raise kids!! Get their first book Teaching Children Joy for when your baby is about 18 months and then stock up on everything they have written! All of their older books are on Amazon and they are all worth buying and reading!

    Next: Raising Up a Family to the Lord by Elder Gene R. Cook! Amazing!!! the CD version is AMAZING and I have re-listened to is a million times! Listen to it while you are trying to get your baby to sleep, his voice is calming and you will learn so much during those quiet minutes!

    Next: A Mother’s Influence Raising Children to Change the World by Margaret D. Naduald. This one is not on Deseretbook anymore but you can find it on Amazon. It’s also AMAZING!! I highlighted soo much in this book.

    Last: 250 Ways to Connect with your family by Melodie Webb. The title is a bit cheesy but the content is also AMAZING!! She totally used the wrong title. It’s packed full of super spiritual ways to connect with your family.

    Good luck!

  23. One of my favorites is “Heading Home with Your Newborn: From Birth to Reality.” It is written by two doctors who are also mothers and it is the only book I read cover to cover. It doesn’t discuss parenting philosophy or sleep solutions but rather is a nuts and bolts book about caring for all the physical needs of this little person that has been placed in your care. It discusses the first fever (which unfortunately will come sooner or later), monitoring incoming (food) and outgoing (pee and poop), and other unmentionables. It also gives an overview of some of the most current philosophical ideas. I found it quite useful without being pushy.

    And remember, no one knows your baby like you do.

  24. I will second the Dunstan DVDs. It’s all about baby language. They make certain sounds when they want something, for example neh means they are hungry. This was the one that I noticed the most and used the most. In the videos they also show examples from many different babies because each one is a little different. I noticed after about 3 months their noises changed a bit, so it’s not a long term thing, but still very helpful when trying to decipher the many cries of your baby.
    I didn’t read many books for my first two, but I’m definitely going to be looking up a few that others have suggested for the toddler/older group. I could definitely use some help with my 4 year old right now. 🙂

  25. I would STRONGLY suggest “The Power of Positive Parenting” by Dr. Glenn Latham. It is wonderful for ALL ages and stages! I had heard him speak a few times and he was wonderful. He was my cousin’s bishop when they were in a young married student ward and he did a lot of parenting training which she passed along until I could get the book. I am expecting my first grandchild in the next couple of weeks and am still using the book. It is almost written text book style and I love it.
    I did use the Love and Logic, Love languages, and the Eyre’s books. All are great but Dr. Latham’s book saved me time and time again. I am the young women’s president and I even use it occasionally when working with the girls.
    Being a parent is one of the hardest things in the world but it is definitely the most rewarding!

  26. Hi Shannon,
    I agree with Rachel, anything from Richard and Linda Eyre. One of the best books i read was teaching your children responsibility. Just some of the simplest things make the biggest difference.
    Enjoy all the books it looks like you will be reading 🙂

  27. When I was expecting twins I read EVERY multiple book and baby book in the library and surrounding county libraries. After they were born my heart took over and I didn’t pick up another book – because I had read them already. 🙂 With five kids, I do refer to the Love and Logic books and “The Power of Positive Parenting ” book to guide me through stages and issues. Best wishes to you and your growing family.

  28. I too agree with Meg. But one chapter of one book did wonders for me when I had my first. It’s the E-A-S-Y routine chapter in Secrets of the Baby Whisperer by Tracy Hogg. It helped me survive after those first blurry weeks of little or no sleep, nursing all the time, and crying (both baby and Mommy.)

    Also, in the spirit of your scripture journaling, I have started a Motherhood/Parenting journal. It’s where I keep scriptures about motherhood and everything I glean from every conference talk, Ensign article, women’s conference, etc., about parenting and motherhood. So in essence one day I’ll end up with my very own parenting handbook, tailor made.

  29. Wow!! So many great recommendations! I, too, feel that anything written by the Eyre’s is a must read, particularly their newest book, The Entitlement Trap. I also liked The First Three Years of Life by Burton White. As others have mentioned that your motherly intuition and guidance by the Spirit are your best tools. With that said, I attended a seminar on parenting by an institute director prior to having children. The question that he asked that has stayed with me all this time was, “How much time, effort, study, and reading did you devote to preparing for your profession? How much time, effort, study, and reading have you devoted to your lifelong job as a parent?” Even now with my children grown and on their own, I continue to read parenting books to support, encourage and recommend to them as they have children of their own. Just trying to be the best grandma ever!

  30. we liked 1-2-3 magic (dvd or book). you won’t need it for a few years, but it is an EXCELLENT way to discipline your kids. we first heard about it thru our pediatrician & we went to a seminar to hear the author speak. it worked very well for us. then when my kids started pre-school, we found out that it was teh same methood that the school uses… so my kids were already familiar with it. my kids are now 10, 7 & 7 and it STILL works. all i have to do is count to 3 & MOST of the time, they stop whatever it is that they were doing wrong. i will be in a store & count & people look at me in amazement that just the simple counting helps me get them back under control.

  31. I’m in the “listen to yourself and your baby” and avoiding *too* much academic reading. Every baby is different, and every mother-baby pair is different.

    What I do recommend is a bit of a hippy-dippy book, and not one you’ll necessarily keep around for ever, but I found it really encouraging… it’s called “Spiritual Midwifery”, and is full of birth stories in the front, with midwifery/technical information in the back. It gave me more direct information than I found anywhere else (outside of asking my midwife directly, but she didn’t draw pictures.) Being prepared for the biological process of birth gave me a good start to my mothering.

    Also, stock up on pleasant reading for when the baby is nursing. I called my mom about day 5 and told her my Brain Was Melting!! and she asked if I’d read anything interesting? Then I remembered that she always used nursing time as reading time (to us, and for herself). I get MUCH less crabby at being awake at 3am if I’m getting to read a chapter in a good story. 🙂

    (I know this is rather selfish, but I’m excited that you’ll potentially be overwhelmed with amazing ideas as you’re home, and will blog loads of great scripture study stuff. We’re homeschooling all our children, and our oldest is getting more out of personal/family scripture study with our new study journals than she did the whole first term of sophomore seminary. She’s delighted, and so am I!)

    CONGRATS on your upcoming baby. Allow yourself to nest, and allow yourself a “babymoon” when she’s here. Those first weeks are hazy, but delightful. My biggest advice as an old mom to a new mom is: babies will be *just fine* in a car seat or bouncy sling on the floor of the shower, while you get in some daily hygiene. You’ll feel far more human with showers and clean hair. 🙂

  32. With all the books being brought upon, I loved them all as well. But the BEST advice I was EVER given, was just to go with the moms instinct. If you feel something is wrong, then go with it. Investigate it. Don’t let a doctor or whom-ever tell you otherwise. The best video/movie series I have watch, and my husband and I both loved it, was the “Happiest Baby On the Block”. You can find it in any type of bookstore, as he has books to coincide with it. We loved it, and it helped with calming ourselves and our babies. 🙂

  33. I agree with the above comments on having confidence in your own mother’s intuition. My typical advice to new moms is to ignore all unsolicited advice! However, knowledge is also good, to know options and allow the Spirit to work in our experiences as mothers.

    One book I’ve returned to again and again over the last five years is Caring for Your Baby and Young Child, Birth to 5 years by the American Academy of Pediatrics. It has interesting developmental info but I mainly use it as a quick reference when babies and kids are sick. I can look up common things and see at what point to call the pediatrician and what to wait out. It has clear, easy to apply guidelines. And all the pediatricians I’ve talked to about situations have concurred with the book. It’s saved us many hours that would have been otherwise wasted in doctor office waiting rooms.

  34. I agree with previous comments that your best teacher will be Heavenly Father as He helps you know what your baby needs.

    Eternal perspective aside (wink), I love Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child to really get an understanding of how kids sleep. I also like the parenting books by Glenn Latham (The power of positive parenting, etc.), although you won’t be at that stage for a while.

  35. The best book ever: “Baby Wise”. Puts you and your baby on a great schedule and the sleeping habits last a life time. The only drawback: hard to get your baby to fall asleep in church since they are so used to sleeping in their crib without a bottle! I can live with that!

  36. You have gotten some wonderful advice! I definitely think listening to the spirit and your own intuition is first and foremost. At this time I would talk to you and your husband’s parents. Since your baby is part you and him, they will be able to tell you anything like food allergies or sleep issues that occurred when you guys were younger. (For example, I had an allergy to milk when I was a baby and it would cause me to be colicky. My mom switched to soy and I stopped being colicky. Just so happened my first baby had the same problem. I switched to soy and she was happy and wonderful!)
    The books I would recommend have already been recommended. So past that I would say that I love babycenter.com. I like knowing what is coming and it is a great resource.
    Also, for when your little one is about 6 months, My baby can talk is amazing. It was so helpful for my daughter to be able to communicate with me basic needs before she could talk instead of becoming frustrated. Last I checked, you can get it on Amazon.com pretty cheap. Good luck! It will be a wonderful experience.

  37. I agree with following your own intuition with my first I read everything and it turned me into a anxious self doubting mom until my husband told me to stop listening to everyone else and listen to my gut. However a few pieces of advice
    1. for me breastfeeding is hard read up on it and find a consultant at the hospital for help. If not DONT feel guilty about it bottle fed babies are just as healthy and happy I have 3 of them.
    2. a Bed time routine is so helpful (example 7:30 bath then massage with lotion jamies bottle snuggle sleep.) everynight and she will be sleeping thru the night soon.
    3. Sleep when the babie sleeps you will have the rest of your life to clean your house and take help when offered! Keep going on dates with your husband too.
    4. take lots of pictures and videos I cannot tell you how fast the first year will fly enjoy every second of it.

  38. I loved “Happiest Baby on the Block” by Harvey Karp. It talks a lot about how to make your child’s enviroment simliar to the womb, which in turn makes it an easier transition for them (and you..haha). I really liked his methods and felt they weren’t as harsh as some of the other books I read. What clinched it for me was that he said you can never hold or snuggle your baby enough :).

  39. I know that I saw another comment recommending “On Becoming Babywise” which has my bible when it came to getting into a routine with my four children when they were newborns. Such a helpful book and yet it allows for deviations because all babies are a bit different.
    I have no doubt that you will do terrific. If your blog posts are any indication, you live very close to the spirit and that will bless you and your daughter beyond measure.
    Good luck! What an exciting chapter of your life!

  40. I have three boys and there was not a single book that prepared me. The best thing you can do is listen to our instincts and to the Spirit. You may not feel like it now but when she is born you will naturally take over. Don’t worry too much. Just enjoy it.

  41. You can’t beat a Mother’s intuition. You will be a wonderful mother. Just follow your instincts and the spirit and you won’t go wrong. Babies don’t come with an instruction book. You will learn by trial and error. Good Luck !!!

  42. My recommendation won’t come into play until your little girl is about two, but I recommend buying it now so you have it when you need it. It’s ‘Parenting with Love and Logic.’ It’s wonderful and has helped me so much! Good luck!

  43. I didn’t read very many books when I was pregnant. I didn’t feel a need to. I have read a few since then although mostly in the toddler section than baby section. Each kid is different. It’s good to know your options, I suppose, but a mother’s instinct is often the correct one. (Granted, you need to be a good person which you most certainly are! There are some crazies out there…)

    I loved Happiest Toddler on the Block so when you read that stage, check it out too. I liked the No-Cry books as well but my daughter was not a baby when I read them and no matter how many ways and how long I tried, it just didn’t work for her. I’m still taking many of her suggestions though–take things slow and only make one change at a time.

    My oldest sister loved and used the Babywise method with each of her three children and it has worked out well for her.

  44. You have received some excellent advice – I heartily recommend most of these! Read-Aloud Handbook, Dr. Sears, Elizabeth Pantley, the Eyres, Glenn Latham’s parenting books, all so great! I think it’s helpful to read up on the cry-it-out methods (Baby Wise and the like) but see what the spirit tells you as you read. If you just don’t like the thought of something (and that may be the Sears’ idea of the family bed, for you) know that it’s the Spirit working and heed those promptings. I know there is so much debate on the cry-it-out subject but I enjoyed the history of the theory in this article: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/moral-landscapes/201112/dangers-crying-it-out

    My favorite breastfeeding book is Bestfeeding by Jack Newman. Can’t beat it! He is so, so helpful when other things don’t seem to be working. Also using a lactation consultant can mean all the difference, so I would recommend you not be hesitant to pay for one if you need the help! And do you know any midwives? Because I just met 2 this year, and I tell you, I have never known anyone with such vast information on all things baby- and family-related — including my own mom!:)

  45. I wish I had Jim Trelease’s book, The Read Aloud Handbook, when my daughters were BABIES. But I love it now that they are teenagers too! 🙂 It has been the absolute best resource! And I give it as baby gifts to all new moms!

  46. You’re such a scholar, Shannon:) No matter how many books you read, you will end up writing your own on each of your kids because there is nothing that nails it all down. However, two suggestions for your journey. I just found the Dunstan thing and thought it would have been so helpful. It got me listening to the babies in sacrament meeting. Secondly, I love a very old book that will make more sense when your kiddo is out of the newborn stage and that is “Children: The Challenge” by Rudolf Drikers. It’s more a philosophy of children book that you can build your own methods on. It’s so great. In fact, I think I had better read it again:)

  47. I just checked back in to see what other wonderful advice has been given and there’s been a ton!
    I love the Jim Trelease book. What a great suggestion.
    And I completely agree with Jessica at 10:37.
    (Especially with regards to breast feeding. I have 5 healthy, lovely bottle-fed babies, which cost me a considerable amount of ostracism but it just solidified my determination in learning to follow my own inspired path – which may or may not look like the majority.)

  48. Wow! I don’t know if you’ll ever get to this comment, but I second the advice about trusting you motherly instincts. That is Heavenly Father’s gift to you.
    As far as when they are older, I really liked “Feed Me, I’m Yours” I was the oldest of 2 children and didn’t have much “baby” experience. It gave me really good ideas about what finger food, etc., was good for my kids. I also almost always fed my children whatever my husband and I were having for dinner, after about age 9 mos.
    Just puree the “casserole” main dish and then add finger food. I rarely bought food for them.
    The next one I’d recommend (for when they are older) would be anything by Richard and Linda Eyre. I LOVED doing Joy School with my children, and they have awesome ideas for teaching your children lots of the basics. I only wish I had been better at implementing them. 😛
    Finally, Shannon, you will be a wonderful mother!! Just listen to the spirit.

  49. My top two suggestions aren’t baby books per se. But are my top two parenting books. One is “The Five Languages of Children” by Campbell and the other is “Parenting with Love & Logic”. I was told once by an LDS counselor that if the Lord had a parenting book that would be it because it so resembles the Plan of Happiness. Kids come with agency. Greatfully they come as sweet little babies to love, hug and kiss before the agency part kicks in:) Best wishes. You’ll love being a Mom!!

  50. A peace of mind resource for me has been “Your Child’s Health” by Dr Barton Schmitt. It answered all those health questions, and saved me from running to the doctor for every little thing. It has advice about home treatment, or when it is advised to see a doctor. Of course, I was raising my children over a dozen years ago, before he Internet made everything readily accessible. I have mayoclinic bookmarked.

    I think you should read everything you can and the Lord will help you know when you find the answers that will work for you.

  51. Hi Shannon, I’m a mother of three (4, 2, and 4 months) and I have to say that “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child” is a great book. It’s written by a medical doctor/sleep expert and his counsel is sound and has worked for my three.

  52. I love the book “Healthy Sleep Habbits, Happy Child.” I think sleep for a baby and toddler years are so important for growth, mind develpment, and all around happiness. This book helped us get on a good schedule and have used it for all 4 of my babies. They all were fabulous sleepers!

    I DO agree on trusting the mother instinct, and every baby is different…but a little help here and there is wonderful!

    Best Wishes!

  53. First off I want to say congratulations! Second off I can’t even begin to tell you how much I LOVE your website! Thank you so much for sharing such wonderful tips. You have made reading and studying the scriptures enjoyable for me!! Now to your question – I HIGHLY recommend the book, “On becoming Baby Wise.” It is all about teaching your children healthy sleep habits and getting them on a good schedule. I have used this method with both of my kids. My son who is almost 4 has always been my awesome sleepier! To this day he goes to bed at 9:00PM and wakes up at 7:30AM. Still also has anywhere from a 1 1/2 – 3 hour nap. He goes to bed happy and wakes up happy! My daughter who is almost 6 months has done so awesome with this too. She goes to bed at 8:30PM and wakes up at 7:30AM. Naps 3 times a day. They both go down happy and put themselves to sleep and I am always greeted with a big smile when I go in to get them. They both were also sleeping through the night by 2 1/2 months old. I am a very organized and scheduled person so this book was perfect for me. I also really like have “What to expect the first year” on hand. It answers a lot of my go to questions. I also enjoy the website babycenter.com. It answers a lot of my go to questions as well. But I also must agree with a lot of what has been said that the most important thing you can do is go with your motherly instincts. You will be amazed how it kicks in and you as the mother will be so aware and know what is best for your kids. Being a mother is the greatest gift and I am so excited for you. Good luck!

  54. Everything by Linda and Richard Eyre, especially Teaching Children Joy. You can find their books at valuesparenting.com and
    http://www.valuesparenting.com/joyschool/?r=32e7885f69f8f74dbbe97a27eb24ed6d
    I don’t think their books start with infants but it take a while to practice what they teach so you have to start early, I wish I would have. My daughter who has 3 little boys, 3, 2 and 1 month is starting their chore chart right now it is so cute (obviously only for the 2 and 3 year old) but it is the Joy and Responsibility stuff that is the best.
    Congratulations! Enjoy her!

  55. I have to say one book that really helped me was “Secrets of the Baby Whisperer” The best part was a chart that she had that helped interpret baby’s cries – I used it constantly with my 3 kids & it really was true. Her descriptions of each type of cry were remarkably accurate.

    Also – Baby Signs. It sounds crazy, but we started signing with our kids when they were very young & they all could communicate quite well very early. The power that they get when they can tell you “eat” and “more” is amazing & relieves a ton of frustration.

    I want to echo the need to rely heavily on prayer. Each spirit is so different & it is very easy to become exhausted & not focus on the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Also – forgive yourself constantly!! I have never felt so helpless & like a failure as when I have been parenting. Yet, I have also never felt such kinship with my Father in Heaven and had such gratitude for the Atonement.

  56. Babywise was great for me, the whole key I took away from it was schedule and wake them up after feeding in the day! And I will swear by woombies if you haven’t invested in one yet, they are great for sleep and we used them until about 9 months. You’ll do great and sleep when she does!

  57. I really must chime in here…. a few people have recommended the “babywise” books. These books are highly controversial and are NOT recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics. Doctors have reported many cases of infants with dehydration and failure to thrive. As a postpartum nurse, I can say that infants still need feedings at night and you should really consult with your Pediatrician before starting your baby on a “schedule”. Just my 2 cents worth!

  58. I am WAY past the baby years but my daughter just had her first and these are 2 of the books she LOVED…

    “Nurture Shock”
    “Brain Rules”

    Hope that helps

  59. The Baby Book by Dr. Sears answered many of my questions, both medical and parenting. It has informed my parenting for eleven years now.

  60. I am a new mom, too. We had our little girl two months ago. These are the books/websites that I recommend:

    1. http://www.aholyexperience.com (this is a blog by the author of a book I listed below. Ann Voskamp. She is a religious woman from the East Coast and has a way with sharing her experiences that is both poetic and touching. I’ve reread her entries here and her book over and over and look to them when I can’t quite get the swing of things and I feel overwhelmed.
    2. http://www.wildnprecious.com (this is a blog by a utah mother who has 5 kids all under the age of four. She is magical, both in writing and in her family and paints a clear picture of what we should strive for with our children).
    3. Mitten Strings for God: Reflections for Mothers in a Hurry (This book is short and can be picked up for a few minutes are read cover to cover in one sitting. I love how this mother shares her experiences and encourages others to really enjoy motherhood while it lasts through each story.
    4. One Thousand Gifts: A dare to live fully right where you are by Ann Voskamp (This book changed me. The way I see my world and how I perceive the gifts of God are totally different. Read it. That is all I can say.)
    5. This talk by Julie B. Beck http://ce.byu.edu/cw/womensconference/archive/2011/pdf/JulieB_openingS.pdf (I love this talk. It helps me prioritize my roles as wife and mother and helps me keep perspective of my purpose and how to fulfill that mission.
    6. I like Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child for sleep training. It fit my and my husbands parenting styles and we felt it was just right for our little girl. We believe sleep is very important and that a well rested child equals a well rested family.

    Most of these are not exactly related to newborns but they are the books that I have gone to over and over again to look for inspiration and guidance in my motherhood. I felt as I turned each page that my life would never be the same and I know the same thing will happen to you.

  61. I love the book.. good night, sleep tight. How to get your baby to sleep, stay asleep and wake up happy!!! You’ll never regret it! My boys go to bed at seven and wake up at seven. I have 3 kids, 5,2, and 5 months!

  62. Baby 411 is a great resource! Instincts are great, but sometimes you just need to look something up, whether it is about feeding, sleeping, or sickness! It has been helpful for me! Good luck! There is nothing better than being a mom!

  63. I think reading as much as you can is a wonderful idea. At least it was for me, everyone is different. At first I had no motherly intuition, I was confused and anxious and worried and exhaused. It was nice to have some knowlege to draw on when I didn’t know what to do, especially in the first few very trying months of my daughter’s life. You just have to remember that every mother, child, and family have different personalities, needs, comfort levels, challenges, etc. and there are many ways to be a good mother. I took a little from one book and a little from another and they helped me immensely. My mother’s intuition has developed along with my “growing” into being a mother. Line upon line, if you will. It is very humbling. Here are a few books that helped me the most, they may or may not help you, but knowlege is power, right? 🙂

    Good Night, Sleep Tight by Kim West
    Happiest Baby on the Block
    What to Expect the First Year
    The Baby Whisperer by Traci Hogg
    Mother Styles by Janet P. Penley (can’t say enough good things about this book!!!)
    http://www.fearlessformulafeeder.com (an amazing support group of women who support both breast and formula feeding, especially relevant to those who had major breastfeeding challenges, like myself)

    Becoming a mother is like no challenge on earth, but you will find that the Lord will help you rise you to the occasion! It’s an incredible journey, congratulations!

  64. Just before the birth of my second child, i knew there had to be a better way to help baby sleep than what i had done with baby #1. I read On Becoming Babywise and it changed my life! It taught me how to help baby #2 get on a healthy sleep schedule by simply following the pattern wake up, eat, play, lay baby down to fall asleep, wake up, eat, play, sleep. With baby #1, it was wake up, play, eat, fall asleep eating, then wake up while being laid in crib, cry, fuss, take a nap in moms arms. It was exhausting for baby and mom. Babywise idea worked sooooo much better:)! Worked great on baby #3 too. Both #2 & 3 slept for 5 hour stretches at night by a couple weeks old. Wake up, eat, play, sleep.

  65. First, just remember that babies don’t read the same instruction manuals. You know that following the spirit (after all your study, of course) is the best way to keep baby girl happy and healthy. 🙂

    That said, I love Richard and Linda Eyre and their daughter Shawni Pothier for parenting resources. Sorry I didn’t read all the responses to see if they were already mentioned.

  66. You may have already gotten this answer, but here is my opinion. There are a lot of great books out there. I am always grateful for people with great knowledge that share their knowledge with others. But the best books I have found on parenting are the scriptures.

    It may sound trite but it is true. The scriptures have provided me with great insight to help me with my family. Sometimes I forget that and look desperately for the answers else where.

    Let me give you an example. When my daughter was 6 we moved from Tremonton, Utah to St. Louis, Missouri. During the first week at her new school tornado drills were held. The only thing Alexa knew about tornadoes was what she knew from the Wizard of Oz. She freaked out! She became irrationally afraid of tornadoes. One night, shortly after her 8th birthday the tornado sirens began to blow. My husband was out of town on business and I needed to get my thee children to the storm cellar. She was the oldest so I gave her blanket and told her to follow me, I was carrying my two younger children. She panicked and became immovable. I had to rush the two boys downstairs, leaving her alone, and rush back to her to carry her down stairs. We sat out the storm all of us in tears.

    I was so afraid for her. I tried to reason with her, I tried to get her to understand that she needed to get to safety, then she could fall apart. I had read books on dealing with anxieties and nothing was working. The thought came to me to look in the scriptures. Since I couldn’t think of any tornado stories in the scriptures I decided to look up fear. I showed Alexa how the topical guide worked and she and I together looked up “fear”. We read through several scriptures that just didn’t seem to help, until we found D&C 50:41-42.

    41 Fear not, little children, for you are mine, and I have overcome the world, and you are of them that my Father hath given me;

    42 And none of them that my Father hath given me shall be lost.

    She started to cry and said, I think that’s what Heavenly Father wanted me to know.

    Never underestimate the power of the scriptures to answer your questions.

  67. I’ve heard that Babywise teaches you not to listen to your baby, but to ingore their cues… I’m wary of that one. But I love everything by the Sears’. To me, their ideas are the natural way of doing things… how animals and humans have done them forever. I’d second the comments about the Eyre’s stuff. Awesome.

  68. Shannon,

    First let me say that you will be the most AMAZING mom. Your little one(s) will be so blessed to be born into your home. Second, I am so excited for you. Being a mom has been more fun and joyful than I could have imagined.

    My favorite books have already been mentioned. I read Babywise, Healthy Habits . . . , the No-cry sleep solution . . . Babywise made the most sense for me and how I wanted to do things, but all three had some good ideas. Letting a baby cry it out sounds harsh, but I find that sometimes the most painful thing in the short-term is the least painful thing in the long run.

    I also loved Happiest Baby . . .

    For newborn baby care, I found a video at the library by Sheri Bayles called “Laugh and learn about newborn baby care.” Seriously, she knows the best way to bathe a newborn.

    Of course, What To Expect The First Year is a great reference book that I have loved and could go to when I have had a specific question or concern.

    If you’re interested in making your own baby food (and it’s completely okay if you’re not), I really liked this website: http://www.wholesomebabyfood.momtastic.com It was also a great resource for knowing what foods I could feed my baby at what age.

    Have lots of fun preparing! I had lots of time to read and prepare, and it was the best thing I could have done.

  69. “Love and Logic” http://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Love-Logic-Updated-Expanded/dp/1576839540 is one of the best parenting books ever, though it doesn’t really apply to babies. I also loved Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. http://www.amazon.com/Healthy-Sleep-Habits-Happy-Child/dp/0345486455/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1332208873&sr=1-1
    Some don’t, I do.
    Other parenting books I have referenced a lot are “The Mother’s Almanac” http://www.amazon.com/The-Mothers-Almanac-Marguerite-Kelly/dp/0385468776/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1332208959&sr=1-1
    and “Your Child’s Self-Esteem.” http://www.amazon.com/Your-Childs-Self-Esteem-Dorothy-Briggs/dp/0385040202/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1332208991&sr=1-1 and oldy, but a goody.

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